Much has happened since my last post. I started the job I last mentioned, and since then, have quit. Restaurants are a hard environment to work in, y'all. I applied for a full-time position within a bakery in a health food market and was re-directed to another part-time position by the supervisor. It sounded promising- more hours, more money per hour, more opportunity for advancement. I felt stuck at my current job- like I had topped out and it was time to progress. So after my fourth interview at the health food market, and what I thought was an implied expectation for being hired (as I was over-qualified, He talked about a start date, and talked money with me,) I put in notice at my job. My boss was really sweet and offered to match the rate at which they would pay me, but I declined. During this process, I had been looking into a discipleship program, and a couple of seminaries- so I was reading a book called King's Cross by Tim Keller. What really stuck out to me was a chapter called The Call. The chapter was about how your pursuit of knowing, loving, resembling, and serving Christ must be the supreme passion of your life.
If you say, "I'll obey you, Jesus, if my career thrives, if my health is good, if my family is together," then the thing on the other side of that if is your real master, your real goal. But Jesus will not be a means to an end; He will not be used. If he calls you to follow Him, He must be the goal. (p.19, King's Cross)
I considered this notion and rationalized that praying for this particular job or a particular school, instead of God's will for me, would be placing the job/school higher. So, I prayed that His will be done and that I would be given a clear answer as to whether or not this job would lead me in the direction God was calling. God answered. I was given a particular day that I would hear from the bakery supervisor. I never heard from him. Over a week past that date, I asked my friend who works at the market and she said that they decided to hold off on filling the position at all, as it may not even be necessary. Now, the position I has expected to get, wouldn't allow me the flexibility to go to the discipleship school and would make it difficult to go to seminary. I'm not going to lie- I was still disappointed. I knew that my boss would let me continue to work, but it was a big shot to my ego. I was over-qualified, I thought. Why was God holding me back in the same place I have been in for over 2 years?
Well, a few days after I told my co-worker, Brandi, that I didn't get the job, my boss came to me and offered me a full-time position- baking. Not managing shop, not helping customers, baking- my favorite part of my job. As if that wasn't enough, I also get to pick what times I come in and work... which opens my schedule up a lot and gives me the perfect flexibility for going to school. So, now we know that God is calling me 1. Into working in some sort of ministry and 2. to go to school of some sort. Not sure where yet- but I for sure feel called to getting educated, whether it be the discipleship program, where I would get a more solid biblical foundation, or to finish my undergraduate degree.
I took a step, blind- and fell, but God carried me through it into taking the next.
So here goes...
God's grace and peace to you all in the coming week. -- Lucy
