As of lately I have felt incredibly burdened with figuring out what "the next step" should be since I quit going to school. My lease is up in June and I need to figure out 1. Where I am going to live; 2. What is going to be my "goal" to work toward; and 3. What steps I need to take to make it happen. I came up with a couple of feasible options, none of which really felt right at the time.
So, I went up to Hope last Tuesday morning to help set up for YAC and spent the day in Cordova to save some gas money. While I was at Hope I talked to one of the leaders of YAC, Molly, about my frustration and outlined my options. After lunch I went to Starbucks and ran into the Marriage and Family pastor, Freddie. He asked what I was up to and I told him I was just trying to figure out what to do with my life- halfway joking- and he sat down and talked to me about it. That's not in this mans job description. I didn't even know that he knew who I was. This one gesture has made my "mega-church" church home feel so very quaint and approachable. My good friend from YAC came and met me at Starbucks shortly after. He knew about my frustration with the situation and just said "The fact that you're thinking about it (some kind of mission work) shows that you must desire it in your heart." In my heart? What is that? Some lovey-dovey phrase I'm not interested in... So I thought.
So, I went back up to Hope and prepared for the service. Worship was incredible... as usual. One of the things I love about our service right now is the genuine out-pour of worship from both the band and congregation. Jim came up and spoke about listening for God- how to listen and how God speaks to us. In the sermon a couple of points really stood out to me:
Life is not about a to-do list. It's about a relationship with Jesus Christ- taking up your cross and following Him.
The bible is full of ordinary people being used by God to do extraordinary things.
We have been designed for God to speak to and through us.
Your gifts and talents often indicate the direction God has for you.
In order to hear God, we need to trust God- this doesn't mean just trusting God in what He's going to do through you but what He's going to do within you as well.
So, after the message, Jim gave us time to sit and listen to God. Through my prayer I recognized that what I truly desire is to serve God in a tangible way- to meet someone's physical needs.
No, I haven't discovered exactly what this means and I haven't uncovered God's plan for me...
but I feel like through this discovery of my desire to serve, I'm inching toward it and that is SUPER exciting and relieving. Apparently, anyone that has known me for any amount of time has seen this in me, but I had been blinded to it. So my friends have been very unimpressed with this discovery, but nevertheless!
On another note, I have been struggling financially lately. Working at a frozen yogurt shop in the winter is rough. Luckily, some tight budgeting and a perfectly timed holiday and birthday enabled me to skim by. So, I've been praying for God to open doors for a new job and not only has that happened but business at work has started to pick up (pre-maturely) and I have been able to work more. So praise Him for answered prayers! My new job is at a restaurant my boss is opening on Madison. It will be awesome to have a change of pace and atmosphere is addition to what I'm comfortable with.
Grace and peace to you guys in the upcoming week! :)
lucy
